It seems the biggest concern my students deal with is their presumption of being too ugly to attract women.
There are various sizes and shapes of insecurity, such as: Some men think they are too old. Some men think they are too fat. Some men think they are too short. Some think they're too ugly.
We should take just a moment to drive out these few myths of attraction, since they do hold many men back from having a successful love life.
Myth #1 - You have to be good looking to get women.
Take a good look around and take not of the different types of men who date attractive women, and you can see this is not true. Simply put, it is essential to look good regardless of your physical attractiveness. Is there a difference?
The difference is, you may not escape your looks, but you do control your presentation of what looks you do have by the way you groom and wear your hair as well as how you smell and the clothes you wear, and so forth. Taking control of your appearance makes any man more attractive.
Myth #2 - Women Think Just As Men Do
It's natural to assume that everyone else in the world sees things the same way you see them.
For instance - If you've ever had a pimple on your forehead that felt so big, it was like everyone could see it. But the pimple was under the skin, and in reality, no one but you could tell it was there. Very few people if any will notice, while to you it is obvious.
You naturally assume that women size you up in the same manner.
Incorrect.
Women have a different set of standards when determining their attraction than men have. This does not mean they have no care as to the attractiveness of a man; they just do not use physical characteristics as a means of judgment as men do.
A woman's attraction bases itself around how a man makes them feel, rather than how a man might look. This is why social status and confidence attract women. Men who make them laugh, they find attractive. Being good at what you do attracts women. Try to understand how this works. For women, looks have very little to do with all of this.
Myth #3 - Women Notice Our Insecurities
Since we know our own selves, much better than anyone in the world ever will, we easily find and pay attention to our every single shortcoming, such as our receding hairline, weak chin, and our big ears and nose and so on.
We notice these small flaws, no matter what they may be.
And because we see it, we assume everyone else does too. But the fact is, most people aren't very observant, and unless they specifically look for something to criticize you about, they're not going to care about your insecurities, whatever they may be.
Many men may call attention to their shortcomings while trying to dismiss and diffuse the things that make them feel insecure. Consequently, all this type of behavior does is managing to call the attention of the woman to the area of insecurity; otherwise, she may not even notice it.
Besides, insecurity is very unattractive. Think about it. Then remember, in every situation it is essential to focus on your good qualities rather than any shortcomings, since the positive will outshine the negative or at least balance it more in your favor.
Myth #4 - Good Looking Guys Have It Easy
Those men have their own set of problems with women. Clearly in the beginning being attractive physically does help, however they have the same issues as the rest of us.
Attraction is the art of magnifying the emotional connection that a woman feels for you, when you are around, this connection will only occur when you are around her, therefore to feel those feelings she will want you to be around her.
If a man matches a woman's physical type, she'll gravitate to him because those features make her feel good. But if the guy is boring, or a jerk, or just not compatible, those feelings will go away.
For example, take a man that a woman is not physically attracted to initially and then give them some time while he causes her to experience pleasure, excitement and fun, eventually, she will become attracted to him.
This is the fundamental concept of attraction - when you make other people feel good, they will want to be around you.
Being a good looking man does not mean, you make women feel good. You simply need to learn how to mingle and interact with women.
Despite any shortcoming you may think you have, once you begin leading a woman down the path of sexual attraction, she begins to see you in a much different light, so you do not have to look like the cover guy on GQ.
There are various sizes and shapes of insecurity, such as: Some men think they are too old. Some men think they are too fat. Some men think they are too short. Some think they're too ugly.
We should take just a moment to drive out these few myths of attraction, since they do hold many men back from having a successful love life.
Myth #1 - You have to be good looking to get women.
Take a good look around and take not of the different types of men who date attractive women, and you can see this is not true. Simply put, it is essential to look good regardless of your physical attractiveness. Is there a difference?
The difference is, you may not escape your looks, but you do control your presentation of what looks you do have by the way you groom and wear your hair as well as how you smell and the clothes you wear, and so forth. Taking control of your appearance makes any man more attractive.
Myth #2 - Women Think Just As Men Do
It's natural to assume that everyone else in the world sees things the same way you see them.
For instance - If you've ever had a pimple on your forehead that felt so big, it was like everyone could see it. But the pimple was under the skin, and in reality, no one but you could tell it was there. Very few people if any will notice, while to you it is obvious.
You naturally assume that women size you up in the same manner.
Incorrect.
Women have a different set of standards when determining their attraction than men have. This does not mean they have no care as to the attractiveness of a man; they just do not use physical characteristics as a means of judgment as men do.
A woman's attraction bases itself around how a man makes them feel, rather than how a man might look. This is why social status and confidence attract women. Men who make them laugh, they find attractive. Being good at what you do attracts women. Try to understand how this works. For women, looks have very little to do with all of this.
Myth #3 - Women Notice Our Insecurities
Since we know our own selves, much better than anyone in the world ever will, we easily find and pay attention to our every single shortcoming, such as our receding hairline, weak chin, and our big ears and nose and so on.
We notice these small flaws, no matter what they may be.
And because we see it, we assume everyone else does too. But the fact is, most people aren't very observant, and unless they specifically look for something to criticize you about, they're not going to care about your insecurities, whatever they may be.
Many men may call attention to their shortcomings while trying to dismiss and diffuse the things that make them feel insecure. Consequently, all this type of behavior does is managing to call the attention of the woman to the area of insecurity; otherwise, she may not even notice it.
Besides, insecurity is very unattractive. Think about it. Then remember, in every situation it is essential to focus on your good qualities rather than any shortcomings, since the positive will outshine the negative or at least balance it more in your favor.
Myth #4 - Good Looking Guys Have It Easy
Those men have their own set of problems with women. Clearly in the beginning being attractive physically does help, however they have the same issues as the rest of us.
Attraction is the art of magnifying the emotional connection that a woman feels for you, when you are around, this connection will only occur when you are around her, therefore to feel those feelings she will want you to be around her.
If a man matches a woman's physical type, she'll gravitate to him because those features make her feel good. But if the guy is boring, or a jerk, or just not compatible, those feelings will go away.
For example, take a man that a woman is not physically attracted to initially and then give them some time while he causes her to experience pleasure, excitement and fun, eventually, she will become attracted to him.
This is the fundamental concept of attraction - when you make other people feel good, they will want to be around you.
Being a good looking man does not mean, you make women feel good. You simply need to learn how to mingle and interact with women.
Despite any shortcoming you may think you have, once you begin leading a woman down the path of sexual attraction, she begins to see you in a much different light, so you do not have to look like the cover guy on GQ.
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