Dating comes with a lot of questions; what do I wear, where will we go, who's going to pay (what a minefield that is). The list is endless and more than a bit exhausting! And all of that even before you start to wonder whether or not to sleep with this someone.
When you checked each other's internet dating profiles all seemed interesting enough, so emails and phone calls were exchanged. And there were certainly some sparks. Now it's face time and that's where the fun begins. Not to mention the confusion!
Let's assume you're one of the fortunate ones and you've hooked up with someone who gives you butterflies. The question you're asking yourself now is "do I sleep with him/her". If the answer is yes, then the next question is "when?"
Unless you have a personal conviction or an iron clad rule about how soon you should sleep with someone (and I respect everyone's personal beliefs on this), I think that sooner is better. Here's why;
Compatibility
I think we can all agree that sex is a significant and essential part of a relationship. For me it's at the top of the list, but that's another story. Of course we look for many other qualities in our mate, but putting sex at the top of that list doesn't make you shallow or superficial. It makes you realistic.
Dating someone is much like a job interview. You want to make sure you select the right candidate for the job. And for the job of lifetime partner, being on an even keel sexually speaking is a must. Think of sex early in a relationship as part of the interview process. After all, you don't want to hire someone who's not up to the job would you? I thought not.
Getting closer
What is dating really but a series of steps we take that we hope will lead to long term intimacy. That is if everything goes well. Our brain however, can work against us while we take these steps. We start to over analyze what we should or shouldn't do. Usually this is based on insecurities arising from past experiences.
Sex is a clever trick to use our bodies natural inclinations in our favor. We all want to have sex. Just follow the chemicals and go with it. Sex, once you decide to have it, isnt a cerebral act.
Yes, I know you've heard it a million times before; you should be comfortable and emotionally intimate with someone before you jump into bed with them. Seriously though? I think that's misguided. Believe me, it's one heck of a lot easier to break the emotional barriers after someone has seen you naked!
Tradition may cause you to wait a certain length of time before getting in between the sheets. I think you can throw those traditions out the window. Putting sex on the menu early on in a relationship is a great way to get to know someone and determine whether or not you're compatible. As far as I'm concerned, that's worth throwing the rulebook out the window for.
When you checked each other's internet dating profiles all seemed interesting enough, so emails and phone calls were exchanged. And there were certainly some sparks. Now it's face time and that's where the fun begins. Not to mention the confusion!
Let's assume you're one of the fortunate ones and you've hooked up with someone who gives you butterflies. The question you're asking yourself now is "do I sleep with him/her". If the answer is yes, then the next question is "when?"
Unless you have a personal conviction or an iron clad rule about how soon you should sleep with someone (and I respect everyone's personal beliefs on this), I think that sooner is better. Here's why;
Compatibility
I think we can all agree that sex is a significant and essential part of a relationship. For me it's at the top of the list, but that's another story. Of course we look for many other qualities in our mate, but putting sex at the top of that list doesn't make you shallow or superficial. It makes you realistic.
Dating someone is much like a job interview. You want to make sure you select the right candidate for the job. And for the job of lifetime partner, being on an even keel sexually speaking is a must. Think of sex early in a relationship as part of the interview process. After all, you don't want to hire someone who's not up to the job would you? I thought not.
Getting closer
What is dating really but a series of steps we take that we hope will lead to long term intimacy. That is if everything goes well. Our brain however, can work against us while we take these steps. We start to over analyze what we should or shouldn't do. Usually this is based on insecurities arising from past experiences.
Sex is a clever trick to use our bodies natural inclinations in our favor. We all want to have sex. Just follow the chemicals and go with it. Sex, once you decide to have it, isnt a cerebral act.
Yes, I know you've heard it a million times before; you should be comfortable and emotionally intimate with someone before you jump into bed with them. Seriously though? I think that's misguided. Believe me, it's one heck of a lot easier to break the emotional barriers after someone has seen you naked!
Tradition may cause you to wait a certain length of time before getting in between the sheets. I think you can throw those traditions out the window. Putting sex on the menu early on in a relationship is a great way to get to know someone and determine whether or not you're compatible. As far as I'm concerned, that's worth throwing the rulebook out the window for.
About the Author:
This post was written by the staff of the Datepad.com internet dating company where you can find thousands more helpful dating posts.
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